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Isabel stages an intervention

June 24, 2010

"This is for your own good, Mom. You'll thank me someday."

After a thoroughly relaxing reprieve in rural Virginia spent visiting friends and vineyard-hopping, rested, quenched and content, I trekked back to Boston with a trunk full of wine.

I unpacked each vintage, casting aside corrugated cardboard and canvas bags, carefully placing the bottles one by one in a formation on the kitchen table.

My cat Isabel, apparently fearing I’d become a raging drunk while on holiday, lay herself down and played dead in front of my liquid souvenirs from the South, as if to stage an intervention by acting out the horrors of alcoholism. Meanwhile, her sister Teva was unnervingly apathetic about my liver’s possible weakened condition.

And in truth, Isabel is somewhat of an alarmist. Like the boy who cried wolf. Except she’s not a boy. And she doesn’t cry. And if she did, she most certainly wouldn’t cry wolf, because she’s anti-canine. Nonetheless, she intervenes in much the same manner approximately 18 hours a day.

But I don’t know what the big deal is.

I don’t have a problem.

Please.

That’s preposterous.

I mean, I’m not going to drink *all* 20 bottles.

One’s for my catsitter.

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29 Comments leave one →
  1. June 24, 2010 1:58 PM

    “One’s for my catsitter.” <— R O F L.

    • MirtoP permalink
      June 26, 2010 12:26 AM

      Don’t laugh *too* hard, one really was. (Thanks, Jess!)

  2. June 24, 2010 2:04 PM

    lol!!! As soon as I saw the picture I smiled! Still smiling!

  3. June 24, 2010 2:04 PM

    I’m not sure about that…it almost looks more like a “Hands off, sweetcheeks” kind of pose than a “I’m going to save your from yourself” pose.

    Perhaps Isabel is in need of an intervention?

    Cat-alcoholism is an epidemic on the rise (except that “epidemic” suggests a certain magnitude already…can epidemics rise? Isn’t an epidemic already REALLY BAD? So maybe it’s a “disturbing trend on the rise.” although that doesn’t sound as poetic.)

  4. June 24, 2010 2:11 PM

    An epidemic could, potentially, rise to a national epidemic or a pandemic.

    Pandemic: n. An epidemic of pandas.

    • June 25, 2010 12:42 AM

      Epidemics of pandas…Does that mean drowning in cheap but disturbingly tasty fast-food-style Chinese take-out?

      • June 25, 2010 10:58 AM

        Yes. Unfortunately, chemicals in the orange chicken cause complete organ shut-down when consumed at those levels 😦

  5. June 24, 2010 2:15 PM

    You should thank her. Rehab is pricey and those ankle bracelets, bulky. Get that kitty some fancy feast and thank your lucky stars.

  6. June 24, 2010 2:19 PM

    I agree with Lori. That is not the “cat intervention” pose. That is the “Mom, if you think you’re giving one to the catsitter and not giving ME any, oh boy do you have another thing coming!” pose.

    I wouldn’t be surprised if you wake up to a bunch of broken, yet suspiciously dry, glass one morning.

  7. June 24, 2010 3:22 PM

    I agree with Lori. Are you sure she doesn’t think those bottles are for her? Perhaps instead of the boy who cried wolf, she’s the cat who cried booze. And then poured herself a glass.

  8. June 24, 2010 4:21 PM

    Two of my favorite things: cats and alcohol! 🙂

  9. Carol permalink
    June 24, 2010 5:24 PM

    I would just like to point out that one of those bottles says, “Eclipse.” Which leads me to think you’re one of those vampire-loving ladies, who’s probably already picked out your Team Edward t-shirt for the June 30th premiere of the next film.

    And yeah, so what I assumed you’re team Edward. I mean pale, skinny, moody…what’s not to like?

  10. redg_rl permalink
    June 24, 2010 7:14 PM

    i confiscated a suspicious item from saba the other eve. it appeared to be some sort of invitation & i thought the address was familiar but couldn’t quite place it at the time. now it’s all too clear: yr girls are throwing a party.

    i’d happily provide you with more details but eraser launched a distraction while saba ate the evidence. He promptly threw it back up but try as I may, I can no longer read it.

    if i were you, i’d get that wine to a safe place immediately. there’s no telling what a herd of drunken cats can do once they put their minds to it.

  11. June 24, 2010 8:19 PM

    I see the NotaViva bottle there. Was the building as massive as it looked on HGTV?

    Also, look at all the yummy wine. Party’s at your house!

    • June 24, 2010 11:26 PM

      Notaviva is definitely a new favorite. We *loved* the Cab Franc. So much so, that my memory of the winery itself is a little hazy.

      • June 25, 2010 2:05 AM

        Cab Franc is my all-time favorite! I knew I loved you before, but now it’s official.
        Nothing witty today. Just that.

  12. Maggie_C permalink
    June 25, 2010 2:10 AM

    That looks delish!

    The wine. Not Isabel.

  13. June 25, 2010 7:02 AM

    Are you sure it’s an intervention. She could also be saying in her performance arty way: “I applaud your efforts to be more like me. This much relaxation could be yours, too “

  14. June 25, 2010 8:28 AM

    Perhaps Isabel is the one in need of a “fancy feast” intervention… 😉

  15. June 25, 2010 11:14 AM

    hah! that’s awesome. my Jete would do that too. don’t they know it’s our human right to drink ourselves in a stupor? cats just don’t get it.

  16. June 25, 2010 11:22 AM

    so, uh, i cook, you wine?

  17. June 25, 2010 12:23 PM

    As long as you don’t drink all 20 – sorry, 19 – in one day, I think you’ll be fine. I mean, you’ll be spacing them out and being able to regulate your alcohol intake shows that you don’t have a problem right? RIGHT?

  18. June 25, 2010 2:35 PM

    Can one be for me? I loves me some vino.

    And some drunk.

  19. sebastian melmoth permalink
    June 26, 2010 1:56 AM

    In vino, vericat.

  20. June 26, 2010 4:09 PM

    I’d consider it an intervention if she ruined that diverse selection by swishing her tail and knocking the whole lot off the table. Cat sabotage…

    …In fact, just looking at that picture makes me feel nervous.

  21. June 26, 2010 9:10 PM

    At least the girls care enough to provide an intervention…my girls are like…you’re a loser…hey look a squirrel.

  22. June 28, 2010 10:29 PM

    I want to be your catsitter!
    s

  23. July 7, 2010 4:26 PM

    Hmm, pets against drinking?

    I’m not sure I approve.

  24. danna bunma permalink
    July 7, 2010 11:19 PM

    You didn’t tell me you brought back 20 bottles!!! Be aware that Isabel, Teva and I may have a more serious intervention in the coming weeks.

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